I ask myself… when did I last take my meds? Ok last night. What about before that? I don’t remember. Why do I feel so different right now? What’s happening around me?
It is critical to take my meds every day. I work too hard in life to have setbacks if I can have in say in it. I told my psychiatrist whom I had already had scheduled (coincidentally) and he was fucking floored with my progress. He said I should be so proud of myself. He’s right. I completely lose myself in my flaws and completely forget about the positive. Oh hey, depression.. you suck.
He told me some great advice today. “Don’t be so rigid Mark.”
LOL… right.. You know me best. You’re my doctor.
I am so hard on myself to be perfect at everything I do. I am a workhorse and I know that I’m good at what I do. I just tend to max out my efforts early on and find the hardest time trying to sustain myself long term. This applies in every aspect of my life. When it comes to taking my meds every day I will just become so rigid in my life that I will forget to take my meds. I even have an app to remind me!
RELAX MARK! Remember your why.
-You haven’t had a sip of alcohol in 16 months.
-You’ve lost 35 pounds in six months and you did it the healthy way!
-You just got out of a five-year relationship.
CHILLAX dude. You’ve got this.